Hello beautiful soul
In 2010, I was living what many would call a “good” life.
A senior role in recruitment.
A home in London.
Married.
From the outside, I looked like someone who had it all figured out.
But inside?
I was crumbling.
Barely hanging on.
Living in a state of perpetual burnout.
I was in an abusive marriage I’d been in for over a decade.
In crippling debt.
Hating my job.
Constantly chasing the next thing — hoping it would finally fix how I felt.
Truth? I hated myself.
And I was constantly trying to fix my life from the outside in — working harder, looking “better,” climbing the ladder — hoping it would finally feel like enough.
I thought the job title would save me.
I thought love would save me.
I thought if I could just hold it all together a little longer... maybe I wouldn’t fall apart.
But eventually, I did.
It all came crashing down when I hired a coach — thinking it was for work.
It turned out to be something far deeper.
She asked me:
“When was the last time you felt joy?”
I didn’t have an answer.
So in 2010, I walked away from it all: my marriage, my home, my career as I knew it.
And I began again.
It felt like relief — but also like ruin.
I had to rebuild myself from the ground up.
Learn to trust myself.
Learn to choose myself.
By 2018, I was Director of Talent at Shazam — a household brand name, a “dream job” on paper.
But behind the scenes, I had a toxic boss who blocked every ounce of my growth.
And by then, I’d done too much work on myself to keep shrinking.
I’d started building my self-belief.
I figured out my values.
I was taking up more space — and that made me dangerous to people invested in keeping things small.
So I did the brave thing again.
I said no.
Not just to that job — but to all the jobs that wanted me to keep playing the same role, to keep being the “good girl” leader who doesn’t make waves.
I backed myself.
I called in a VP People role at Onfido — leading a team of 15, on a four-day week, with a £30,000 pay rise.
Then came the Chief People Officer role.
Another £30,000 on top — and when I took it full-time six months later, my comp increased again by 20%.
In under four years, I went from £90,000 to £186,000 plus bonus and stock.
That wasn’t luck.
That was the result of years of backing myself — even when it felt shaky.
Of learning to lead without abandoning who I really am.
Of finally seeing my worth — and demanding that others see it too.
By 2021, the call was clear: I was meant to coach.
To support women the way I had needed support.
To create what didn’t exist when I was trying to hold it all together.
To take everything I’d learned — from corporate life, from breakdown, from rebuilding — and weave it into the Bloom method I now share with so many humans today.
And in coaching women, I saw the same patterns playing out again and again.
Brilliant, capable women with big hearts and big jobs —
Still walking on eggshells.
Still burning out.
Still stuck under toxic bosses, toxic cultures, or toxic partners — quietly asking themselves:
“Is it me?”
It’s not you.
And it never was.
Last year, I left my second husband.
Another “good on paper” relationship that slowly broke my heart.
Saying no to that life was the hardest thing I’ve ever done —
and the clearest yes I’ve ever given to myself.
And it gave me the fire to launch Women Who Lead.
Because this isn’t just my story.
It’s our story.
Even now, there are moments I feel the old patterns rise.
The urge to overwork. To prove. To stay quiet.
But I know what it costs me.
And I won’t go back.
We’ve all been taught to shrink.
To settle for what looks good, instead of what is good.
To keep hanging new curtains in a burning building and call it self-care.
No more.
I created Women Who Lead to help women stop abandoning themselves in life and work — and step into careers, power, and lives beyond what they were told they could have.
Not by becoming someone else —
But by becoming more of who they already are.
So if you’re in a job that secretly hurts...
If you’re walking on eggshells with a boss who keeps you small...
If you’ve done everything right and still feel wrong inside...
If the life you’ve built doesn’t fit anymore...
You’re not broken.
You’re just standing at a crossroads.
And your body already knows which way is true —
even if your mind’s still catching up.
And I’ll be here when you’re ready to answer.
We have ONE SPOT left for the June cohort. Hit reply and let’s talk — no pressure, no performance. Just two women exploring whether this is your time.
Rooting for you always
Ruth x
Ps. If you’re ready to be all of who you are, there are a few ways I can support you with that right now:
- Join my FREE session in the Sisterhood this week: Sacred strategy: Align. Anchor. Act. This is your space to pause, plan, and reconnect with the leader you're becoming. Signup for the community for FREE here.
- Hit reply if you think you might want to be part of the next Women Who Lead cohort but aren’t quite ready yet — I’ll make sure you’re on the waitlist.
- I have two spaces open for 1:1 clients — hit reply if you want to find out more.
- Invite me to speak at your company and let’s see if we can get them to invest in the women on your team.
And if you need a little inspiration in the meantime —
Watch Women Who Lead, the podcast here, or listen here.
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