Hello beautiful soul
I’m sitting here at the end of a very long luteal phase (perimenopause hi how are you), sitting at the doorway to autumn or the fall, and that feels so synchronistic.
We don’t talk enough about our cycles full stop. And when it comes to the shadier side of things, we try to avoid it.
Tell me I’m wrong.
You feel frustrated and self-critical, but you slap on the mask and get on with it.
Some of us love autumn, sure… but do we really lean into those darker mornings and evenings the way we turn toward the sun and the light?
What a long season of winter in my own life taught me (divorce hi hello how are you) is this: the key isn’t gaslighting yourself out of life’s challenging moments. The real flex is feeling them. Naming them. Acknowledging them. Being with what is.
(Yikes, do we have to?)
Yes honey, we do.
Because seeing the truth of our circumstances is essential for our growth. Otherwise we’re constantly burning out. And burning out in ways that don’t even look like burnout from the outside.
Not the dramatic collapse-into-bed kind. But the quieter kind that hides in plain sight. The version where you’re still functioning — showing up, delivering, even performing well — but inside you feel flat, numb, disconnected.
This, my friends, is functional freeze. And here’s the dangerous part: you can stay in that state for years, convincing yourself it’s just how life is.
And women have got so good at it that we don’t even know we’re actually burnt out. We just think we’re “fine.” A little tired. So we push on.
Let me help y’all out with the 4 stages of burnout. Because burnout builds like a slow tide:
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The need to prove yourself — Motivation tips into overwork, fuelled by external validation. Especially in a new role.
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Neglecting your own needs — Skipping meals, rest, movement. Small sacrifices that pile up quietly.
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Leaving yourself behind — Justifying behaviours that don’t align with your values. Resentment grows.
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Depressed, lost, exhausted — The final stage. You’re overwhelmed, unsure what’s wrong. The only way forward is creating space to hear yourself again.
Burnout isn’t only about exhaustion. It’s about the cost of abandoning ourselves.
And that cost for women is HIGH, with disproportionate rates of autoimmune disease. We are not okay gang.
Right now, though, nature has given us a mirror.
We’re in a threshold moment. In Ayurveda, it’s called Ritu Sandhi — the space between two seasons, when the body recalibrates and the nervous system wobbles.
In the Celtic wheel, we’ve just crossed the autumn equinox — day and night held in balance, before we tip into the darker half of the year. A time to harvest, to give thanks, to shed what is finished.
This is the Alchemist’s season. She sees clearly what no longer works. She helps us release the false, the heavy, the expired. She reminds us that letting go is its own form of power.
The equinox asks:
What are you grateful for in this harvest?
What is ready to be shed, like leaves falling from the trees?
Where are you braced that could soften?
Take a breath now. A big belly breath, all the way up your spine.
Notice your shoulders. Notice your back meeting the surface beneath you.
First, brace. Feel the tightness, the holding.
Then, soften. Let yourself sink.
Most of us live in a braced state without even knowing it. Try it now. Feel the difference between braced and receptive. This is how we make space to receive what we’ve been asking for.
Now, reflect using my 4 C’s of self care — rhythms that restore us:
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Connection — Practices that bring you back to yourself: meditation, walks, stillness.
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Configuration — Structuring life like an experiment, letting work and rest evolve.
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Community — Surrounding yourself with the right people at the right times. Women have always known the power of this. Our ancestors didn’t survive alone — they gathered. We must too.
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Consistency — Showing up for yourself in steady ways, building trust with your energy.
Do a quick brainstorm: one micro experiment for each. Then pick JUST ONE to try this week.
Nature just granted you a hall pass... will you take it? 🍂
Because when you create space — through gratitude, through release, through breath — something powerful happens. You remember your wholeness. You remember you’re held.
And that’s how burnout begins to lose its grip. That’s how you remember you are sovereign AF and worthy of rest.
Rooting for you always
Ruth x
Ps. Did you catch the latest season of Women Who Lead: The Podcast btw? If not, don't worry, I got you.
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